The Key to a Healthy Christian Marriage
For many Christians, sex is often a taboo subject. It rarely comes up in conversation and is almost certainly avoided during sermons or other church settings. There is really no right or wrong way to make love when you’re in a loving marriage. If both parties are inclined to engaging in something sexual, then it should and will be acceptable in your and God’s eyes. The only point at which sex becomes a negative is when it is met with distaste or unwillingness from either person. That is to say, coerced or reluctant love-making is not indicative of God’s will for your sex life.
Despite the fact that you are obviously married to your spouse, there should never be a time at which personal sexual gratification becomes the primary or sole goal. Everything should be done in concert in the same way you do many of the other things with your spouse. For instance, a husband would not force their wife to join a gym just because he happened to enjoy it. Sometimes there can be an expectation that the wife should comply with every desire of the husband, but that’s not necessarily true. Women, obviously, have their own desires and thoughts and sometimes they don’t include having sex.
Besides, sex with an unwilling partner does not maintain the same sort of intimacy you’d find when both parties are equally interested. No spouse (regardless of gender) should be under any obligation to perform or please their partner if they do not feel inclined to do so. Of course, a healthy sex life (even in a Christian marriage) can be a sign of a healthy and Godly relationship. If sex becomes uninteresting (or even repulsive) to one spouse, then it should likely be dealt with head on. If disinterest crops up only once in a while, you can probably chalk that up to the natural flow of life. But, if it is persistent, it might be high time to spend time praying and communicating with your spouse.
Overall, though, demanding sex is not a sign of a healthy relationship. It’s important to strike a balance in which sex becomes an intimate, sensual, and spiritual activity and not merely an operational task or physical discharge. It’s important for married Christian couples to take their sex life seriously in spite of the fact that it is generally glossed over in many venues of Christianity.
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